*Ceara Elise* (violetdreamer) wrote,
*Ceara Elise*
violetdreamer

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so...

when was the last time i wrote in here? I dont even know. I think it's been a while but Im not sure...

so basically school is better. I'm actually studying and working hard and stuff... although Im sick AGAIN. Freaking hell, will I ever be well for like more than a week? The damn mono just sent me into this continuous cycle of getting better, then worse, then better. It just weakened my immune system. Even when Im well I'm like super dooper tired after only 3 hours of being awake... or less. Sometimes Im fine, though, and I guess sometimes is better than never. Im feeling better at the moment. Hopefully I shall continue to feel better.

Soon school will be over for a long time. Im excited and uncertain of everything at the same time. I hope I'm making the right decision. But if Im not, I'll come back. I just need to focus seriously on what I really want to do, instead of wasting time only half-doing what I want, and being miserable because Im not where I want to be, or getting there. My mom supports me in everything, so that makes it worlds easier.

I think about my past a lot. Every day actually... I dont know if that's bad or what. I just feel such remorse for things that went crazy and I have no control over now. It's weird how different things are now. Soooo different. I mean, I think about where I was a year ago, and it's like a different lifetime or something. In a way, it sort of is. I really miss Ian. I read his journal every now and then. He seems to be doing a hell of a lot better and I wish I could tell him how awesome i think that is, but i cant. Maybe he'll read this, who knows.

Im always either busy or sick or sleeping. I finally saw everybody for the first time in a while at Christina's party last weekend - was that last weekend? I think it was. Her hair looks so adorable. Christina's that is. You better not have dyed it black!

Dad finally sent me money. I was expecting like $150, and he sent $60, but hey, that's my Dad for ya. But with it, Im gonna get my tire replaced on my car finally, so it wont blow out while Im driving to school one day and make me wipe out on the highway and kill myself. That would suck. Um...okay that was a disturbing thought...

anyway, Im also going to order the Winsor pilates dvds... because Daisy Fuentes uses them and she's my idol! No, Im just kidding. Im really ordering them because Im going to get back into dance and I need to work on my dancer's muscles considering I havent danced in like 4 years. Im excited about that. It's gonna rule.

Oh yeah, Insomnia closed down, as I think everyone knows by now. That was weird and sudden. Last night I went out to eat at Ru San's. Damn, that was good food. Sushi rocks my socks. Anyone who hasnt been there, go, and I'll tell you what to order. Man, I am hungry.

Okay I guess I should probably go home now. Im at GSU in the computer lab. I came to do this experiment thing for psychology and there was a massive accident or something and I ended up being 45 minutes late because of mad crazy traffic. The lady who was supposed to give me the experiment had left, so I came to the computer lab to print out my psych notes. Now Im gonna go home and go running, weeee...
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